Just Don't Call Me Late for Dinner

A few years back my husband Ned bombed a job interview with one word. The word was "elderly." It was an interview for a principal's job and they asked him something about the best way to keep a staff energized, and in answering, he wanted to speak about how he'd inspire the teachers who had been around the block several times, despite their many years of teaching. In giving a great answer, though, he referred to those folks as elderly. 'Nuff said. Next candidate, please. (The correct term he should have used was "veteran teachers.")

Elderly isn't a pretty word. Nor is "old." "Veteran" sounds too much like we served in World War II and let's face it, if we did, we're most likely more aptly described currently as "dead." And, since I'm heading to "old" pretty soon, what with turning 60 in five months, I think it's time to find the perfect term, the "bon mot" if you will, (good word in French, I'm feeling worldly today) for describing someone "of a certain age." (another term I can't stand... what age is that certain age?) And, that's when it occurred to me. Why do I need a word? What not use the actual number?

To quote a Vice President of Circulation I once worked for when I worked at a newspaper, "The number is the only thing that matters!" (If you bang on the table with your fist while you yell that at the top of your lungs, you'll have almost the perfect picture of our Monday morning marketing meetings. If you throw in the F-word while you bang and yell, you'll have the exact picture.) But, as profane as he was, he was also right. The number is the only thing that matters. After all, when you are talking about someone's age, or stage of life, you are only referring to the number. Each person defines his or her own number and that's my point.

The number itself has gotten a bad rap, which those of us who are living to defy it, know already. So what if I'm FILL IN THE BLANK HERE WITH YOUR AGE? Don't judge me by that number. I should be able to shout the number with pride without adding an adverb or adjective. "Old" or "elderly" conjures a visual of a shrinking person with thinning hair and thickening waistline. But, look at me when I tell you I'm 60 (Okay, not yet, but soon, and it fits this post better than 59 which sounds way younger, right?) and you'll see that this is what 60 looks like.

Here I am with my daughters. It was last week, a great day in which we celebrated the new teaching job of the youngest child. So, yeah, I'm 60,  you may think of that as "old" but do I look it? (Rhetorical question, I hope. If you don't agree, feel free to yell "Hell yes you look old." I won't hear you and I can go on thinking I look amazing.)

So, folks, here's the thing about today's rant about those of us who are 60-ish. We're old...er. We're also wise..r and calm...er. Don't live by the adjective. Live by the number and then fashion that number to fit your own style. Don't be boxed in by anyone's idea of what your life should be based on the adjective which describes your number. Live the adjective you want to describe your number. And, when someone asks your age, proudly announce your number. (Or, just for fun, add 10 years and they'll immediately tell you how good you look. If they don't, that's a problem you may need to attend to.)